We shall have something like these....

There was a sudden tickling feeling on my thigh. I instantly doubted the man sitting beside me; I hated him for ignoring the other empty seats in the bus and choosing the empty seat beside me. And the worst part is he did this when- you know what- just entered the bus. The feeling was like you were hogging upon nice yummy biryani and you enthusiastically chewed a four inch long chilly.

So when I was waiting like sulking child waiting for an opportunity to vent out this anger, my phone vibrated in my pocket. Though I wished the guy messed with me so that I could give it back to him amplified (please note that I am still straight), the feeling waned in a matter of a few seconds as my brain responded to the stimuli and recognized that my phone was ringing. I carefully reached for it; it was Muley- my room mate.

Of late we have been practicing a lot for the ‘World’s laziest bum’ contest. So as a part of the practice we have decided to work on our dinner plans and decided to pick a parcel on our way. I agreed half heartedly as this means a few extra steps with my newly bought designer Italian shoes (for all those who do not know how I look, the next time you observe a tall fair guy with shoes that are too long, too slim and too shiny, like the ones the hero in the fairy tales wear…… errr that SRK wears, you can safely conclude that its me).

So as I carefully ascended the steps of our take home biryani center, my concentration was instantly bought by the owner who seem to be extremely interested in my ID card. There is nothing more contending than some attention for an average SE engineer. So I moved the ID into and away from his line of vision and enjoying the way he hypnotically craned his neck like a pendulum (as I am writing this I am cursing myself for having not concentrating on my new shoes ). Things got more exciting when he did not move away from the ID, for first I was a bit worried about getting mugged, but that was a very stupid thought. I instantly praised my laziness for not being able to thought further.

As the next few seconds were spent in trying to control the adrenaline rush into the blood, the excitation peaked when the owner approached me and took hold of my ID. I widened my eyes; and even a child observing me would have concluded that I had a throat infection by looking at my upper throat; I opened my mouth so much. I gave up my oath to laziness and started thinking about the possible reasons for the owner’s interest in my ID card. My brain started calculating all the possibilities- Is the guy a big fan of Infosys? Is he going to offer us some exorbitant discounts? Or DOES HE READ MY BLOG? DID HE RECONGNIZE THE GREAT AKP? I stopped breathing at this instant. I needed to listen to his intentions to choke myself back to breathing.

He said “Hamare paas aisa bhi kuch hona chahiye”.

I flushed instantly; he apparently wants to issue this kind of ID cards to his staff too. My face turned pale, to control the bile I had to cancel the order we placed and rush off the center taking enough care not to damage my new Italian designer shoes.