The art of disposing......

If disposing were to be a sport, I am a very bad sports man.



Not that I am a good one, if otherwise; but I am particularly bad at judging what is not necessary for me and hence I just keep clinging to things.

I was lucky enough to realise this tendency of mine when I was in my fifth grade, most probably, when my mom decided to teach me how to be more organised in life. It is a different fact that she has been more close to be a miserable failure, considering the way I live, as if were married to chaos. I don't blame her, as I reckon I am particularly bad at disposing things off.

Now just let me bore you with a few a few reels of flash back, people get ready with your vomit bags as I get ready to take you through my child hood.

"Anil babu, clean your cupboard, its getting nasty day by day"
"Yeah, mom".

I headed towards my cupboard and opened the doors, thud, a few books and even more loose papers fell down just like a lion would come out of its cage. Oops I thought and cursed myself for not putting them properly last time. I sat down with all the energy and conviction of a man who made up his mind. I then laid my hands on a few test papers, the answers to which I had written in the test would have confused otherwise composed teacher to death. I thought of throwing those test papers away, but I decided against it as I want to give them to my sister/junior as I strongly used to believe that my teachers were too lazy to set different set of questions. So, the file containing the loose set of test papers was saved.

The same was the case with my notes, text books, pens, pencil boxes etc. Though my dad was generous enough to heed to all my tantrums of possessing anything my eyes could recognize as a useful thing for me in the market, I never let off my old things and the result- Three trunks full of notes and test papers and pens etc which my mom one day has disposed off in all possible ways ranging from selling stuff off to the old papers boy to distributing the text books to servant maid's kids, of course she did risk a thunder storm reaction from me as I tend to get very disappointed when I lose my stuff and believe me she has done lots to divert me so that I do not constantly pester her why she disposed off things.

I grew up and so did my possessiveness. What used to be just confined to notes and pens has now crept to people. I cannot just dispose of relationships when they don't work. The more the person tries to run away from me the more I try to chase him/her(though this tendency of mine, as I have observed it, is more prevalent with the opposite sex.). Now I wonder, did watching Tom and Jerry so much, had an ill impact on my life. And this tendency of mine has sent chills through many a spine. I have become thorn in the flesh for those people who, I thought, did not understand me.


Now, when I recognize how good a sport disposing is, I look with awe, all the good sports(wo)men who play the game. Anything that does not work, or you think that it does not work or anything that is unnecessary has to be disposed off, and this more importantly should be followed with people if not with things. Because, piled up things just consume space, but piled up feelings/dreams/persons/relationships eat up into you the more you give space to all these things the faster you disappear. So people, dispose- start living.