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The Pain I gained......

I reached out for a hand, there is nothing to hold
And it’s another moment of pain spent untold.

My heart, it shouts out in agony
Why it has to realize pain in this way?

Do we really deserve it? You say
Is this really the price I have to pay?

You say “I am stronger than you and it’s easy for me”
it's easy to say that girl, but its hell to be me.

Because, it’s you that I am defenseless against
And you hold the weapons that pierce through me.

You say I am rude, but if you see, it’s just not me,
Because, the whole episode is about you and me.

If punishment is the only way out you see,
I will take it all, Coz I can’t be what I have to be.

I will take it as an expression of love from you
Because, I hear what ever I shouted at you.

Let’s take back our words, and go back to blissful ignorance
And spare me this hell, and kill this deafening silence.

You are hurting me, I know, and it’s on my name.
But, as I said, I would love to take all the blame.

Now, when I look back and see what did I gain?
Its nothing but these odes of pain, sheer pain.

Gyan....

The most important thing in a relationship is to trust, your luck of course.....

Washing clothes?

Disclaimer: Yours truly makes his best attempt to wear washed clothes, though the chances of seeing him in pair of crumbled trousers and crushed anti wrinkle shirts is pretty high, you can in all possibilities safely assume that the clothes are washed.

If I were to be given a chance to decide among a promotion, a beautiful girlfriend and a genie that washes clothes, I would choose the genie. The very imagination of an alien looking creature with a tail on its back and a horn on its head washing my clothes is thrilling, exotic, romantic and what not?

Considering the fact that there are around three hundred thousand CAT aspirants, I would not make an attempt to introduce this article to you, because logic would say that this article is about a music Video on MTV (you might have guessed my CAT score by now).

Coming back to the topic, washing if it ever were to be called an art, I would have been light years away from being called as an artist and I would have ardently worshipped all the dhobis in this world. Washing is not an art nor am I interested in washing, but my tryst with washing or rather not doing it has seen new highs of late.

An average humanoid blind folded and sent into my 3 bhk flat has high probability of laying his hands on my used garments, considering the fact that I have sold out any thing that can be distantly called as a paper last week at the rate of Rs.6 per k/g, and believe me I am almost as rich as Ambani brothers after the old paper deal. But I promised you that I will be talking about washing clothes, so let me do.

Washing clothes is something which I love, I love it as much as I love to be bitten by a rabies dog, or kicked by an average donkey. However, I managed to avoid washing clothes for first 18 years of my life. Thanks to Suramma, our maid during most of my child hood and a BPL washing machine which deprived her of the most favorite job. Whatsoever the reason, I never thought or even bothered to think about the efforts to be put into undoing the dirtying of clothes the act which I guess I am pretty good at and I never would have bothered to think about washing clothes unless otherwise it is as easy as pressing Ctrl + Z.

But, the world wide web, IT industry and my company had other ideas for me. Though I have been deceived by a jumbo size launder mat, where some weird looking machines just keep washing clothes for eternity, making you feel that you need not even think about the word wash for next 100 years, reality dawned upon me when the honey moon period with my company, what they call training has been completed. Since then, there are many things that have changed like my location, my managers, etc but something that stayed with me always is the pile of dirty clothes on my chair, which of late my room mates are using as a cushion sofa, they claim that it is pretty comfortable.

At this, juncture of the article, all those Dravid bhakts who were hurt by my Tit for Tat post might think, ah you dumbo, why dont you employ a bai or why dont you buy a washing machine. They might also claim that I am wasting their time by writing articles here, the logic behind which my weak brain is yet to understand. But the good news is that, I have tried the above options.

Bai: Many a Bai, have been employed to wash clothes for exorbitant to extra exorbitant amounts, but only to quit the job before even joining as they got frustrated knocking at a door behind which only TV and chairs stay during the weekends, our land lord is strict, he says that no human being shall habitate the flat during weekends. And hence yours truly raids the friends' flats.
Dhobi: There was a time when everything I used to wear goes to a dhobi for rejuvenation, but after I saw the cleanliness of the water body associated with washing the cloths and after my misplaced 10 pairs took me around 2 months and hell lot of effort, like befriending whole dhobi community, to locate, I had given up on the concept of dhobi.
Washing Machine: Me buying a washing machine would be a bigger joke than Anil Kumble delivering a spin delivery. Considering the fact that I have recently been abused by my savings bank account (abuses have been with held for readability) for molesting it, even the very thought of buying a Washing Machine sends shivers through my spine.

I also have tried different other ways where I used to take all my clothes to my friend's washing machine, but after one such saga where my 50 odd pairs almost emptied the water tank of the building and my clothes decorated almost whole of his balcony, my friend started suspecting if I have started a side business and even enquired me if I was in urgent need of money and he still asks me how much do I charge for washing clothes.

Having said that, the fact remains that washing is a herculean task for me. I would work out and develop a Hrithik like physique, or would learn to code in Java or learn Mainframes or even try my hands at learning marathi, gujarathi or would even stay in a remote town in East Africa, but washing clothes?

Oh my god! Love marriage????(1)

Today:

Pehli nazar main …… Atif Aslam started singing from the bottom of Prem’s ……… errrrr………mobile. He answered.

P: Hello?

Caller: Mr. Prem your appointment letter is ready, we have couriered the same to you, hope you received it.

P: Yeah I did, I am not really happy with 8.5% hike, can you make it 9%?

C: Come on Mr. Prem we have already increased it from 8.25% to 8.5%, we can’t increase it anymore, you are too greedy.

P: You call me greedy??

C: Oh no. That was meant for the person sitting beside me, don’t you worry and one more thing our cab will come and pick you up tomorrow sharp 8 am, is that fine with you?

P: Oh why not, that’s fine with me, thank you, and bye.

Prem is on cloud number nine. He has negotiated successfully into a much sought after change, he changed his company and from tomorrow it’s all new, a new place, new people and new responsibilities. And apart from all these things, some thing is going to be proved, some thing that has been bothering him for years together. He couldn’t wait; he scrolled onto his contacts and called Joy baba, his mentor.

P: jai Joy baba.

JB: Hey dude, wassup.

P: Baba, as you have suggested, I have changed my job, are you sure this change would help me realize the truth I sought.

JB: Hey mate, doncha worry man, Duh!, jus believe me, eh!

P: Jai Joy baba.

The time was 1030 hrs, that day Prem drank his break fast, drank his lunch and gulped his dinner and slipped into his bed. Tomorrow would be a great day for him. He is going to understand the most basic fact of life tomorrow.

A few months ago:

The train was moving through a remote village in Maharashtra, green paddy fields, sugar cane fields, blue skies and fresh breeze striking the your face through the window, refreshing. But for him, it was just a piece of earth put to use by men, his heart is raging with a strange feeling, he closed is fist and hit the railing that crossed across the window, a sharp noise and the railing now looked more like a speed breaker ahead symbol.

This weird act caught the attention of a gentleman sitting; he immediately got into a conversation.

GM: hey, what’s wrong with you?

He: Nothing just disturbed.

GM: Oh, strained relationship?

He: Is that so easy for you? I broke up with 9.5 girls till now.

GM: 9.5?

He: The last to last one was not she, I mean I was not sure if she was she or …. You know?

GM: But 9 is a good number, why are you worried?

He: Worried???? I miss girl friends more often than Laxman misses place in the team. I always wanted to have a love marriage…….

Hearing this GM roared, laughing loud and fell on the floor. Our hero could not understand what went wrong, unless our GM started speaking.

Dude, marriage itself is a big mistake and you want a love marriage??

He: But, what’s wrong, I guess that’s in thing now.

GM: That’s for girls, not you.

The next one hour was spent discussing the cons of marriage and more cons of love marriage, there were no pros. And finally…

GM: My name is Baba, Joy Baba.

He: I am Prem, just Prem. (Prem’s parents had a love marriage and fought about whose surname should their son carry, but no one could win and hence Prem remained just Prem). So you mean to say, you will make me understand how boring combination love and marriage would be for a guy in a few months?

GM: This is my number, keep in touch.

Since, that day, Joy Baba has become mentor for Just Prem.

Tomorrow:

to be continued..........

Team Work, a farce?

Team work works! Or does it?

Many of us have been taught in many of our professional training courses the importance of team work behind the success of a project. How team work helps us out of a difficult situation which, otherwise would have been a failure. But the question here is what team work is? Does it work? Rather, when does it work?

A team is nothing but a group of individuals working towards a similar or single goal and they are working towards it because, consciously or unconsciously they know that achieving the team’s goals would help them achieve their goals, say a H1B visa or a role change or a better increment etc.

Now say that we all are playing a game, a game where the primary goal is defined, say a role change. And every one in the team is playing for that. To achieve this goal, we need to do certain things which help others in achieving their goals and since their goals are fulfilled we achieve our’s.

Each of the team members has his /her own strategy, some does good work, others ‘show case’ things to their managers and a few others exploit human weaknesses but each one has his/her own dominant strategy, the strategy might help the wider cause, that is the team’s goal or it might just deceive the whole team that by just pretending that it serving the wider cause.

This is what happens, rather what has been happening in the society since time immemorial and this idea, of farcing the team that you are serving the purpose of the team and hence you should be rewarded by helping you achieve your goal, is good or bad is always a dilemma.

Now let’s say, that we need to play this game say for n times with the same set of players. What happens now is that the mutual knowledge of each other’s strategies exists, previously there was always an element of uncertainty in the mind of at least one player on another because of lack of common knowledge, but now since each is almost cognizant about other’s strategy and this is the point where team work ceases to exist.

The reason for this is that in human society, the concept of rational co-operation exists only if you know less. If the ignorance or uncertainty ceases, the rational co-operation collapses too.

Now, say there exists a team where the individuals are rewarded and the reason behind the rewards does not exist, or a team where there exists no common goal and every one is working towards their personal goals or a team whose team members know each other’s strategies too well do you think any team work exists?

The above mentioned scenarios of different teams constitute at least 70-80% of the teams, every one works for their own motives, we call it selfishness but what I want to conclude is that team work is a farce or at least it would become a farce once we get to know the team better, so why team building exercises and all, let there be a directive, contribute to the company’s growth and help yourselves grow.

A summer morning...

The sun was on summer spree
When I went out to roam free
The day was hot as told on TV
Exhausted I went for shade of a tree.

The tree was big and the shade was good,
I looked here and there, I needed some food.
I found something to munch, and as I did
Screech was the sound; I turned and I saw a hood.

The hood belonged to a jeep
I guess it’s used to carry sheep.
Four men came out and gave me a peep
They tied me up and put me in the jeep.

After a bumpy ride the jeep came to a stop
I was near a tall building and I jumped out with a hop
I was not happy, I mowed and wanted to mop
I was pulled into a lift and taken to the top.

The house was new and I could smell some ghee,
I was pulled into it and then set free.
They fed me water and treated me like a queen bee.
Ah! Only then did I realize that they wanted me to pee!

I can never understand these beings, humans
They claim that they have lot of acumen
But ask a captive Cow it to pass urine
in a new house and call it a house warming ceremony.

How can I bid goodbye ?

You keep saying that it’s the fact,
But it is so hard to believe
That whatever happened is just past,
And that you have to leave.
My heart, how can I say to it
That there is no point to grieve.

When all I could see is you,
In everyone who passes by,
With everything so blue
Without you in my eye,
I hope I could forget you,
And it’s as easy to say bye.

In the busiest of crowds, I am a loner,
In the loneliness left by you.
All that remained of me is a dreamer
Because, it’s in dreams where I could see you.
Ah! They say that the grass on the other side is greener
But to me, with out you every side is blue.


When the parks we walked through
Refuse to recognize me without you
When the love so deep and thorough
Chooses to leave me and go
How to tell you what I am going through
Neither could my wet eyes search you.

And yet, you keep saying that it’s the fact,
But it is so hard to believe,
That whatever happened is just past,
And that you have to leave.
My heart, how can I say to it
That there is no point to grieve.

The Orkut Photograph

Ekambaram is a worried guy. Every morning, he wakes up and heads to a mirror expecting to see something very pleasant, but for last 24 years he was always been for a rude shock. He sees his face. Believe me, my reader, Ekambaram is no hot property, with a slab like face to which hang two ears as if there are 2 question marks suspended and a nose which makes even the likes of camels and cows jealous and eyes which would, if were not to be on his face, have been confused for dead fish and a few wisps of reluctant hair sticking above the fore head. Barring near and dear, who got used to the frightful experience by the long habit of looking at it, his face could be lethal enough for a heart attack, if stumbled upon by nervous souls.

And even then, he optimistically troubled many a photographic lens to gaze at his face, all thanks to Orkut.

Something has to be done to this habit of publishing photographs on Orkut. People's strong sentiment is that a by watcher goes through your profile, gets spellbound by the photographs, and immediately rushes to your scrap book to leave a scrap asking you for a date.

Unfortunately, it works the other way round for many people. Once some one reads the profile, gets excited by it for all the great things written about your features, turn ons and turn offs and heads to see the photograph and see a rat like face wearing spectacles, their faith will be shaken, they conclude that this man would be no good for anything except for knowing where to go for a vegetarian lunch. And another prospective date is lost. All because of a photograph. And if you do not have a photograph of yours, there is no prospect as such.

But, of late, it seems like people have come up with a solution for this- utilization of the high art methods of photography. There are no more photographs, just the camera portraits or lens impressions. It’s interesting to know how these methods would change your prospects. I realized this when I happened to visit Ekambaram's profile recently. He changed his photograph, in the previous one he stares at us as if he is confused by the camera and in the back ground there are a few white clouds against blue skies with two crows flying across. The present one is completely different. It is a portrait; he called it "one-twentieth face". It is taken from behind, showing only the back of head, the left ear and what might be a pimple or a flaw in the print. It looked as if he was surprised by the camera when he was coding at the office. There is no question of which of the two pics looked better. Only then did I realize that almost all of us are same when it comes to looks, the less we see each other, the better it would be and no wonder Orkut is banned in most offices.

How to know whether you are lucky......

I always feel that ‘luck’ is a strong word to use and I never believed in it, I think that we are all part of a game called life which is based on probability in which odds for you is termed as luck and odds against you otherwise. However, my tryst with what we call luck has turned out to be pretty romantic of late. So here are a few tips for you to help whether you are lucky or not….



1) Drop your mobile into a glass of water and remove after 30 secs, if you are lucky the mobile works.

2) Park a non MH registered vehicle in a no parking area, if you are lucky it will be there for 1 day or more.

3) Go back home on a bike on the wrong side of a highway, if your lucky you will reach home.

4) Propose to a good looking stranger.

5) Keep arguing with your manager.

6) Write sensible blog, if you are lucky some one will post a comment.

7) Write something against batting speed of Rahul Dravid, if no one criticizes you for everything else but you writing that Dravid bats very slow, then you must be lucky. Very Lucky.

Do post your thoughts in comments section......