The Orkut Photograph

Ekambaram is a worried guy. Every morning, he wakes up and heads to a mirror expecting to see something very pleasant, but for last 24 years he was always been for a rude shock. He sees his face. Believe me, my reader, Ekambaram is no hot property, with a slab like face to which hang two ears as if there are 2 question marks suspended and a nose which makes even the likes of camels and cows jealous and eyes which would, if were not to be on his face, have been confused for dead fish and a few wisps of reluctant hair sticking above the fore head. Barring near and dear, who got used to the frightful experience by the long habit of looking at it, his face could be lethal enough for a heart attack, if stumbled upon by nervous souls.

And even then, he optimistically troubled many a photographic lens to gaze at his face, all thanks to Orkut.

Something has to be done to this habit of publishing photographs on Orkut. People's strong sentiment is that a by watcher goes through your profile, gets spellbound by the photographs, and immediately rushes to your scrap book to leave a scrap asking you for a date.

Unfortunately, it works the other way round for many people. Once some one reads the profile, gets excited by it for all the great things written about your features, turn ons and turn offs and heads to see the photograph and see a rat like face wearing spectacles, their faith will be shaken, they conclude that this man would be no good for anything except for knowing where to go for a vegetarian lunch. And another prospective date is lost. All because of a photograph. And if you do not have a photograph of yours, there is no prospect as such.

But, of late, it seems like people have come up with a solution for this- utilization of the high art methods of photography. There are no more photographs, just the camera portraits or lens impressions. It’s interesting to know how these methods would change your prospects. I realized this when I happened to visit Ekambaram's profile recently. He changed his photograph, in the previous one he stares at us as if he is confused by the camera and in the back ground there are a few white clouds against blue skies with two crows flying across. The present one is completely different. It is a portrait; he called it "one-twentieth face". It is taken from behind, showing only the back of head, the left ear and what might be a pimple or a flaw in the print. It looked as if he was surprised by the camera when he was coding at the office. There is no question of which of the two pics looked better. Only then did I realize that almost all of us are same when it comes to looks, the less we see each other, the better it would be and no wonder Orkut is banned in most offices.